I hope your fucking radios fall on your heads tomorrow. BILL BURR: SNL MONOLOGUE (2020) – TRANSCRIPT Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and the “woke” white women. Yes. Take out your weak cousin with the asthma. He goes, “It’s gay pride month.”And I was just like, “Oh!” Dude, you know when you’re just like, stuck in the matrix and you just can’t– [keeping his palm very close to his face.] These are equator people. Thank you. I do 3 minutes. Fun isn’t it. How stupid is that cancel thing? I hope the glass gets fuckin into your fuckin shoulder blades and then I see you afterwards “Hey how’s it going” [simulates slapping a good friend in the back] Enjoy the fuckin show? That’s what I learned. You guys all look like surgeons with your masks on. All of you mother fuckers. Fucking Rocky is your hero. 7 Mother fucking minutes left. 6 Minutes left and I will be selling my CD after this shit you mother fuckers [CHEERS] and the only way one you’re getting one is if I throw one at your fuckin stupid heads. Thank you. Bill Burr scores valid points on canceling the crop while trying to cancel ALL IN SIGHT. Stand-up comic and former “Breaking Bad” actor Bill Burr has ignited a Twitter firestorm — for mocking everyone from white women to gays in his … Went to the Banana Republic, picked a 20 dollar shirt off the rack. That’s not bad 12 minute rant. Bill Burr Tackles Cancel Culture For His ‘SNL’ Debut, While ‘The Fly’ Has Jim Ploughing ahead, let’s talk white women here. I hope there’s a line of all of you guys getting fuckin car jacked and they take out their big black dicks and they just shove them right in your fucking mouths. Wow, thank you. Viewers may know Burr for playing Patrick Kuby in Breaking Bad, although he has also fronted comedy podcast The Monday Morning Podcast since 2007. Fucking goddamn losers. I hope that bridge collapses onto your pathetic lives. I gotta tell you, the way white women somehow hijacked the ‘woke’ movement, generals around the world should be analyzing this. Getting booed by people sittin in the fucking grass. Because a … Bill Burr [Starts with SNL monologue intro] [Cut to SNL stage] [Band is playing music] Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, Bill Burr. Bunch of fucking losers. Why don’t ya just get the fuckin Ice Capades down there you assholes. You fuckin jackasses. New York is back. Fuck all of you and fuck the liberty bell, and shove it up Ben Franklin’s ass. Shall we? God I hope mass aids, full blown, like fuckin you get weak as you walk to your fuckin car and you just pass out and they just find you next to your ’83 Fucking Monte Carlo with gravel imbedded into the fuckin side of your bald ass fuckin head. Burr then spent his 12 minute set picking apart every thing about the city from its food, its sports teams, its icons, all while receiving boos from the audience. I’m like, “Some people not using safe sex and making all these babies?” So, I finally walked up to this old New York door guy and I was just like, “Dude, what’s going on? Go fuck yourselves. Two guys kissing. You know? And I was getting all claustrophobic. Fall out of one of those piece of shit buildings. 8 Minutes I’m doin it all. Coming to you straight from the Rialto Square Theatre in Joliet, IL to your seat at home! And all of a sudden it went off the rails like, “Oh! I really hope that happens. Comedy is not for you. Who’s he your dad or something? Oh!” I didn’t know that. Is this what you want? With my SUV in my heated seats. If you’re that dumb and you wanna kill your own family members, by all means, do it. This is probably the funniest SNL Monologue in a long time and it is no surprise that it offended the Twitter community. The universe has to balance itself. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. So, why don’t you shut up, sit down next to me and take your talking to. It aint’ ever happening. Roland Gabriel running around without a fuckin helmet. Someone tell him calling women "bitches" isn't funny It's 2020. And then somehow white women swung their Gucci booted feet over the fence of oppression and stuck themselves at the front of the line. Sam Morril compares wearing a condom to doing volunteer work, wonders if murderers critique each other’s work and recalls befriending a vigilante in Cleveland. Transcript of the "Philadelphia incident" where comedian Bill Burr went on a 12-minute tirade attacking the audience after the previous act was heckled heavily by the crowd. #SNL — Lori (@LoriAndJava) October 11, 2020 Bill Burr's opening monologue is just obnoxious and misogynstic. Yeah! I hope that happens to you. FEMA would never show up for you fuckin’ assholes. What else what else. Bill Burr had an amazing monologue on "Saturday Night Live." He ripped cancel culture coming for John Wayne and woke white women. It had to happen. I don’t know. Maybe I wouldn’t have a bunch of cunts not fuckin paying attention 4 hours into a goddamn show. It's 2020. I was shooting a movie. I should get fucking paid right now people. I’ve never heard so much complaining in my life from white women. About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features You guys were here man. © 2020 Scraps from the Loft. Thank you. Tank tops! Ah! What the fuck am I gonna do at this point. Dude I think he can win! You don’t know who the fuck he is. Your fucking Rush T-Shirts that say I beat the shit out of my girlfriends. Read the transcript of Bill Burr stand-up monologue at the Saturday Night Live in October 2020. “Bill Burr's opening monologue is just obnoxious and misogynstic. Bunch of goddamn fucking losers. The full transcript of Bill’s monologue at the SNL is now available. But let’s go back in history here, okay? everything’s just pressed up, you can’t see anything. Comedian Bill Burr hosted Saturday Night Live last night (with Jack White filling in as musical guest after that country nobody Morgan Wallen was dropped for acting a COVID fool), and his opening monologue gave some a case of the cringes and others a case of of the slow claps. All rights reserved. You fucking assholes. That fuckin pussy team. BILL BURR: SNL MONOLOGUE (2020) – TRANSCRIPT Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and the “woke” white women. I hope somebody takes a fuckin beer stein and just slaps you in the back of your zit infested fucking shoulders and your awful man tits hang. I like people who wear masks. Bill Burr - SNL MonologueBill Burr snl#BillBurr #SNL #Monologue Jesus Christ the goddamn people on this show are givin me shit. Yeah. It ain’t ever fuckin happen. The nerve… where’s the camera at? I wanna thank you guys for having me. Thank you very much. Remember that had that whole season when they wore the slacks. Anyway, I don’t know. That night Burr became the tamer of unruly audiences and earned an incredible amount of respect from comedians and working class audiences that now adore him. Your team should be selling cotton candy in the fucking instructional league. You won one fucking world series since 1880. Yeah, the audience isn't full of Bill Burr fans like a normal show he would do. Required fields are marked *. 52 fuckin hours into a show. Suck a dick. How did they get all the June? You guys stood by us toxic white males through centuries of our crimes against humanity, you rolled around in the blood money and occasionally when you wanted to sneak off and hook up with a black dude, if you got caught you said it wasn’t consensual. You are this high above New Orleans. I got one first. I hope your mother has herpes in the center of her asshole and you go home tonight and lick it and get it on your tongue and some other horrific shit happens that involves cancer – all of you. I hope I hit a baby in the fuckin head. Bill Burr: Snl Monologue (2020) – Transcript November 5, 2020 Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and the "woke" white women. It’s gonna be amazing. Bill Burr didn't hold back in his controversial opening " Saturday Night Live " monologue. You have a soccer team? Makes me feel comfortable that you’re wearing masks. Stops you from reproducing. I hate the way you eat with your little shitty ass subway. Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, Bill Burr. Didn’t have that when I was a kid. You fucking bunch of losers with your fucking cellphone pictures Fucking suck a dick. They’re trying to cancel John Wayne. I guess my grandparents were older. You people are on goddamn acid. All of you go fuck yourselves in your own assholes. Bill Burr's SNL monologue was funny and appropriate. 2 to the back of the head. I really hope all of you run into all those black people that you love so much here in Camden. OK. Everyone’s chained to their fuckin chairs and just start blowing your fucking brains out. … It’s Pride month.” And I’m like, “What’s that?” I’m 52. Be the first to rate this post. Ploughing ahead. That’s’ it I come out here with a fuckin gun right. I’d grab you buy the fuckin hair but you don’t have any. I had to buy a fuckin shirt for this shit. View all posts by Don Roy King. What’s that? into a fuckin show. You have no idea what it’s like to be me.” Trashing white guys. Go fuck yourselves. I don’t know. Get the peep show back in Time Square, old people can walk safely 40 blocks away. Everybody’s shivering. Sun goes down at 4 in the afternoon. Here's why. I’m like, “What’s going on? Fuckin boo me 9 hrs. That’s the first time I said cunt. I wish I was on his fuckin tour right now. You’re all gonna get fuckin cancer which is fantastic because all your fucking heads are shaved anyway no one’s even gonna notice. Bill Burr's opening monologue is just obnoxious and misogynstic. No one gives a shit. Does it really have to come to this people? Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and white women.Saturday Night Live. Suck a fuckin dick. That’s a little long, don’t you think? Nobody wants to go on the parade. From the jump, the unruly Philly crowd set the tone of the night by booing the first comedian off the stage and then proceeded to give hell to all other comedians on the bill. Sir why are you screaming? Oh Fuck all you people you ya know what you fucking losers, I hope you all fucking die, and I hope those fucking Eagles never win the Superbowl. And I’m gonna laugh at your fucking funerals which is gonna be great. White women, you’re amazing. You’re gonna get fired for coming to work too late cause they’re not gonna notice that you have fucking bone marrow cancer. Bill Burr is exactly the comic we DON‘T NEED RIGHT NOW. Have a good night. It’s about you. Don’t worry. Listen, I don’t want to speak ill of my bitches here, okay? All of yas…can line up with your Harold Carmichael fuckin jerseys, and one at a time you can all suck my dick. You guys were phenomenal [Crowd Cheers] Oh no.. I still fuckin hate you people. With your red candy-striped faggot fuckin uniforms. What are you taking a picture of E-Rock? Fuck all of you. City of Brotherly Love. Give them the sun for 31 days. What’s that sir? Dave Chappelle. What’s that sir? Please stick around, we’ll be right back. Stand-up comic and former “Breaking Bad” actor Bill Burr has ignited a Twitter firestorm — for mocking everyone from white women to gays in his first “Saturday Night Live’’ monologue. Suck a dick. bill burr : white women, stop acting like white supremacy and racism and oppression is only something yt men benefit from , you are also complicit and have also benefitted yt women and some people on this forum : he's hurting my feelings , he's wrong That’s what I do. I broke the mic stand. Huh? I SAID SUCK A DICK. The whole pride of your city is built around a fuckin guy who doesn’t even exist. Speaker Bill Burr: Thank you. I’m fuckin standing here. The reaction to what he said undergirds white supremacy. Say it. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Comedian Bill Burr has come under fire for his monologue on Saturday Night Live this week. They’re literally running out of people to cancel. And it was about that for about 8 seconds. Fuckin be up here talking about Hitler. The Netflix star referred to white women as his “bitches” while claiming … You all gonna go see Rocky 19. 0% body fat. I got your mothers. 3 minutes left of this motherfuckin tirade. No votes so far! Booing Dom Irerra. So anyways back to the joke. You and your fuckin Donovan McNabb shirt. Bunch of goddamn pansies. The Flyers. I hope the cheese melts your faces off. “My life is so hard. That’s great. Oh, Ricky took one in the chops. In 2006 Bill Burr and many of the regular comedians of The Opie & Anthony Show were on The Traveling Virus Comedy Tour, hitting large venues around the nation. This is probably the funniest SNL Monologue in a long time and it is no surprise that it offended the Twitter community. Do they even fuckin exist anymore? Huh. “Remain Seated,” his latest solo special, will show you why this Grammy nominated, multi-platinum recording artist, and Billboard award winner is at the top of his game. Larry the Cable Guy – Remain Seated (2020) – Transcript, Craig Ferguson: Just Being Honest (2015) – Transcript, Kevin Hart: Zero F**ks Given (2020) – Transcript, Sam Morril: I Got This (2020) – Transcript. Just to refresh your memory, the ‘woke’ movement was supposed to be about people of color not getting opportunities, things that they deserve, finally making that happen. When the artist before him was booed off the stage, Burr decided to go on the offensive. That aint’ gonna work. It's 2020. You can all lick my fucking red nuts. I hope he snaps both his fuckin ankles the first goddamn game. Bunch of pussies. I would really enjoy blowing everbody’s fucking brains out. You bunch of faggots. Jack White is here. You keep it simple. It’s like, god did that 40 years ago. So, I haven’t been in New York for about a year. Thank you. Fucking standing backstage for 3 hours to get booed by this GED fuckin stupid-ass piece of shit fuckin crowd. You got fuckin Joe Frazier is from there but he’s black so you can’t fuckin deal with him, so you make a fucking statue for some 3 ft fuckin Italian you stupid philly cheese-eatin fucking jackasses. Fucking assholes. I never heard of it, right? The next day somebody’s mopping up the 3 pounds of fucking brains that are actually left in this goddamn crowd. Some other shit-assed team that’s never gonna win a championship. What brilliant shit are you gonna fuckin tell me? Look at this. Right? I hope you all get in your Ford Focuses and fucking drive off the side of that faggot ass Ben Franklin bridge. I hate this fuckin city. Bunch of racist fucking morons. 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